Troubled Soul
Like many of you, I am grateful for the respite from winter. To be clear, I am not fooled. We know winter is not over and will likely come back with a vengeance. But we will take what we can get.
In the midst of this midwinter respite, we begin the season of Lent in which we seek to "deepen our piety, devotion, and readiness to mark the death and resurrection of their Savior."* Having such a focus is not a light task, as any focus on the death of Christ will certainly feel the weight of our sin that necessitated such a death. But experiencing difficulty in thinking on the death of Jesus puts us in good company, namely in the company of Jesus himself.
John 12 is one of the clearest instances of Jesus talking about his coming death (cf. vv. 23,24, 31-33). In his conversation with a group of Greeks he shares that his death is near, that he will die via crucifixion, and that his death will be for judgement of the world, driving out of the enemy and drawing all manner of people to himself. It is clear that Jesus knows who he is and what he has come to do.
Yet, in the midst of these clear proclamations, Jesus also says, “Now is my soul troubled. And what shall I say? ‘Father, save me from this hour’? But for this purpose I have come to this hour" (27). We hear hints here of Jesus' agonizing prayer in the garden as he asks his Father to spare him from drinking the cup of judgement if possible (cf. Matt 26:38, 39, 42). Sin, and its effects, is troubling, terrifying even, and should trouble our souls. Our looking at the cross should, as it did for Jesus, bring a stark realization of just how deep our separation from God is and the enormous sacrifice it would take to bridge the gulf. While this is troubling, it is good for us to pause this Lenten season that our piety may be deepened and our appreciation for the work of Jesus enlarged. The hymn writer expresses it well in Beneath the Cross of Jesus, when she says, "and from my stricken heart with tears, two wonders I confess, the wonders of redeeming love and my unworthiness."
What happens when these wonders pierce our hearts? In many ways that is the focus of this week's look at Acts. We will be primarily in chapter 2:42-47 where we are told that "awe came upon every soul" (v. 43). It is an incredible passage about the transformation of a community marked by Jesus. I look forward to digging into it with you this week and coming together throughout this Lenten season to open our hearts to wonders of redeeming love.